Procrastination
It’s been longer than I like since I wrote my last article. The truth is, I’ve been working on other projects and was using those activities as an excuse not to write. Like anything we want to master, writing needs to become a habit. Something that’s done at the same time regularly. As someone who studies performance techniques, I know this is to be true also for athletes and musicians. One doesn’t become a concert pianist unless they develop a habit of daily practice. Habit creates momentum!
So, why did I let myself fall out of the habit? Because there are times when it seems like a lot of effort for very little reward. Why go through all the pain and frustration? Sadly, this is the same excuse I use to not exercise. I rationalize that I could spend my time more effectively on other pursuits, and to be brutally honest, the time spent on other things doesn’t produce many results either.
There are patterns of success and patterns of defeat that we run in our lives. I have no doubts that you’ve also engaged in this pattern. At its core, what we’re doing is trying to avoid perceived pain and get to comfort as soon as we can. Don’t beat yourself about doing this! We’re hard-wired to behave this way. That doesn’t mean we can’t override the pattern it just means that avoiding pain is a defense mechanism that has kept us safe.
If we drill down further, we’ll discover that the underlying problem is that we’re not even trying to avoid that which causes pain. What we’re really doing is trying to avoid something we perceive as painful, and that’s an entirely different matter altogether.
Consider what happens when we ask our teenagers to do a chore around the house. They immediately bristle and try everything they can to avoid doing what we asked them to do. Somehow, they have linked up that doing that chore equals pain. Doing the chore may mean they won’t have enough time to do what they want. Again, they’re trying to avoid pain and get to comfort as soon as possible. Changing their perception of the activity will change how they feel about the chore and once that is conditioned, will change their behavior. How do we begin to do this?
Being aware of the problem is often the first step to changing it. Many mornings, as I lie in bed and think about my day, I’ll ask myself a question that focuses my mind. What pain am I trying to avoid today? By being honest with myself, I can become aware of what has been blocking me from taking action, and then I can take steps to change it.
Ask yourself the same question when you can’t break through. What pain are you trying to avoid?
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